Are you in the flow?

Did I mention that I’m currently reading “Flow” by Mihaly Cyikszentmihalyi? What is it about? The subheading will tell you: The psychology of optimal experience. The way to happiness and all that jazz. I think I started writing songs because songwriting put me in a flow state, only I didn’t know that back then. It just made me feel good. Thanks to Czikszentmihalyi I now know why: Songwriting helps me forget myself. Now why would forgetting myself make me feel good? Because “preoccupation with the self consumes psychic energy”. Whenever we feel insecure or are in doubt about our goals and beliefs the self is threatened. (Clinical side note: People who suffer from a psychological condition called borderline personality disorder have a very unstable sense of self, their identity is in a permanent state of fluctuation. That’s why they often recourse to quite drastic means such as having multiple sexual partners in one day, drugs or even self-mutilating behaviour to re-establish order in consciousness. That might seem illogical, but self-inflicting pain actually gives them a sense of control and thereby reduces tension just like kneading your fingers when you’re nervous does.  It also brings them in touch with themselves or more specifically their bodies which again reinforces their identity. ) When the self is threatened we have to invest energy in order to evaluate if our identity is still intact. For example if your boss tells you off you might question your abilities for a moment and might have to reassure yourself by visualizing past successes. That costs time and uses up your attention that could otherwise be directed towards completing a task.

Have you ever asked yourself why you have more energy after working out or doing something creative like painting or playing the piano than after activities such as watching TV or a chit-chat with a friend? While doing the former you enjoy yourself, while engaged in the latter you experience pleasure. Most people come home from work feeling tired and longing for rest so they turn on the TV or have a glass of wine while checking what’s new on Facebook. There’s nothing wrong with that, the only trouble is – it doesn’t actually restore their energy levels. On the contrary. These activities (if you can even call them that – activity implies being active after all) tend to lull the brain to sleep with the result of feeling more tired afterwards instead of refreshed. Flow activities on the other hand – the ones that make you feel enjoyment – leave you feeling energized and balanced. Why is that?

In years and years of studying optimal experience Czikszentmihalyi has found eight characteristics of flow activities. They tend to be activities that 1) match perceived difficulty and present skill level, 2) require focus, 3) have clear goals and 4) provide constant feedback, 5) allow deep involvement that remove everyday life worries from awareness, 6) give you a sense of control, 7) make you forget your self, but have it emerge from it stronger and more complex than before and  8) distort your perception of time. Now for the non-artists and non-athletes among you, don’t worry: Every activity can be shaped into flow so to speak. You just have to find the challenge. When you wash dishes for example you could try to be especially fast or plan your day while doing it. When you interact with others, try to stay clear of small talk and dive into a discussion about politics or whatever else is of interest to you in order to stretch your intellectual muscles  by coming up with convincing arguments for your point of view. When you cook dinner, improvise. Surprise yourself.

Many people fall into a hole when they retire or even just go on vacation because for them their jobs are the main source of flow experiences. You can prevent that from happening by a) building up your repertoire of flow activities and b) honing your ability to turn everything into an optimal experience. People in extreme situations such as being a prisoner of war or being bed-ridden for months or even years can be great role models. Frida Kahlo, the Mexican surrealist painter, was confined to her bed after a severe accident. So she had her parents mount a mirror above her and place her easel next to the bed. Instead of painting landscapes or other people she produced countless self-portraits and thereby turned her limitation into an artistic vision.